Seifer: It's Just Me
by Animus.Lupae
Summary: This is a one-shot based on my life at the moment. Disclaimer: I do not own Seifer, though I really wish I did...


Seifer glared behind him, eyes shifting to see if he was being followed; he felt like he'd crawled his way outside his own house, careful not to awaken his own parents. Now he was in the middle of the sandlot glancing this way and that. It was so unnatural for Seifer to feel so worked up over nothing.

Even if it was only about six PM, he was usually allowed out much later of course, he still felt nervous; he wasn't allowed out for the reason he was at the moment: to find Hayner. He'd called his rival out for a fight about an hour earlier, but he'd made sure no one else knew about it.

He could see people giving him odd looks as they'd walked past; the lone boy with his arms crossed. He didn't need their pity, he knew people felt bad that he made his life out to be such Hell, but he didn't need them to tell him they knew, they could go mind their own fucking business.

But he was so good at masking his feelings with anger, no one could see how stressed out he was sometimes or how much he wanted to get away without being followed. Sometimes the stress was so bad he could probably talk himself into jumping off a ten-story building; other times it felt like he already had. The worst part was that he knew he shouldn't have to deal with it; he needed someone to blame. But if he blamed, people would say it was an excuse for his own guilt; he didn't need a pity party, this was his life.

It was just him.

Suddenly, Hayner's figure appeared and Seifer smirked; he would _never_ admit it out loud, but that kid was the reason he'd decided to stay alive. Hayner could give him everything he needed: a release from anger, someone to pick on, someone to sympathize…

"Hey Loser." He greeted, not unusually of course. "You're late." As Hayner closed the gap between them, Seifer could see how determined the other blonde looked. Good, that's what he needed.

"Got the bats?" Hayner nodded at Seifer's question and handed him one, eyes narrowing. "Why do you always wanna fight, huh? Why can't you just leave me alone?"

Seifer's smirk nearly faltered; what kind of question was that? He needed satisfaction; he needed to feel that anger, the even deeper fear, the pain… That's why: because Hayner was the only one that could deliver.

"Scared Lamer?" He asked, covering up his moment of though as Hayner, always easy to anger, raised his bat eagerly and shook his head. "No dipshit, let's go."

Seifer could only nod; he was in terrible need of that satisfaction right now, he needed to feel fear, anger, and pain right now, he wanted too be challenged to fight someone who wanted to kill, he needed it right now.

"Actually _try_ this time, I hate when you lose so easily."

He'd gotten the reaction he wanted: a swinging bat from Hayner. He did nothing to stop it, he needed it to hit him, needed it to pump him up. It hit him on his bare arm with a smack and he smiled, laughing. It had hurt, but it was a good hurt.

"Come on Hayner, that all you got?? I'm gonna beat you to a pulp, then I'm gonna go for Roxas, and then Pence; maybe even your girlfriend, Olette. It'll be pretty easy without you there to stop me, you want that?"

Someone cut his tongue out, stick it on a pole… He was too riled up, he was threatening Hayner worse than usual. He had to stop talking, it felt like he was losing control, like nothing that was left could stop him; he felt invincible.

"Ha, I'm gonna beat the air from your lungs Seifer, you'll never breath again." Seifer let Hayner's bat connect squarely with his stomach. Despite the fact it had winded him, he swung his own bat, unsure where it hit before he lowered his own head, smiling.

/Don't forget my soul, Hayner, I don't need that anymore either…/

Hayner brought his bat down, swinging at the side of Seifer's face. As soon as he'd hit the muscular blonde, Seifer yelled out, dropping to his knees. He continued smiling though, grinning, this was what he wanted anyways, he couldn't run away now. He needed the satisfaction, the fear, the terrifying experience of pain, maybe then he'd feel okay.

He'd put his _life_ in Hayner's hands; now he would feel okay, he had too.

He pushed himself up, blocking another swing from Hayner with his own bat; he liked the determined look still plastered on Hayner's face.

They began fighting, their bats swinging, occasionally connecting. Shouts of anger and sometimes pain emitted from the two boys. Then, Seifer's greedy gaze watched as Hayner's bat swung towards his face; he closed his eyes, slowly turned himself around, and let it hit. He fell forward, almost in slow motion. Hayner watched in shock and fear as Seifer hit the ground, head bouncing once before he lay still, struggle bat forgotten on the ground beside him. Hayner knelt beside him, hand on Seifer's shoulder, shaking him gently, whispering his name.

This was what he wanted, it was just him now, the only one Hayner was focused on. He could handle this, this is what he wanted.

It was just him.

* * *

A/N: Well… This fan-fiction is actually based on my life right now. If you've never heard the song It's Just Me by Escape the Fate, then you have too; I'm not actually joking, every single line in that song can connect to my life in more ways than one, and so this morning I woke up and decided I had to write, I was feeling too worked up, there was too much on my mind…

That's probably why the writing isn't my best quality, and why there is lots of repetition (though that is also part of the story, it's the part that gets you to realize what exactly it is he _really_ wants. XD)

So… Please review. I'd love some criticism, I don't get lots of it from readers, but please make it constructive. 3

Thanks, Lupae


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